When Mom or Dad is an Alcoholic
The children of alcoholic parents grow up with a unique set of problems that are likely to follow them throughout their life.
Because their home life is uncertain, these children experience high levels of anxiety and depression. They may feel guilty, thinking they are the cause of the problem. They may feel acute embarrassment and the need to keep the alcoholism secret. In families where alcoholism leads to violence, the children may be victims of abuse.
According to child psychologists, the children of alcoholics are more likely to have problems with intimacy and trust. They have been disappointed by their early caregivers and will find it hard to form close and loving relationships later in life. Lack of self-esteem is another common problem for children with alcoholic parents. They feel singled out and isolated because of the problem in their family. They may also feel anger at both the parent who drinks and the non-alcoholic parent who seems to allow the situation to continue.
Impact of Alcoholism on the Family
Due to anxiety and depression, children of alcoholics often have trouble in school. A stressful home environment may make studying difficult and there may be a lack of educational enrichment in the home. Studies have shown that children with alcoholic parents often have trouble making friends and may develop problems with stealing, fighting and truancy. Activities that support healthy development such as family vacations and participation in community events don’t occur due to parental drinking.
Some children react to alcoholism in the home by taking on an adult role at a very young age. They shoulder many of the responsibilities that their parents have shirked and may even care for a parent who is drinking. They may become overachievers in school and create a controlled life for themselves. However, the emotional problems that they attempt to hide will eventually take their toll and require some form of treatment. They may experience other serious emotional problems such as obsessive compulsive disorder.
The Legacy of Alcoholism
Many children of alcoholics are unable to escape the unhappy circumstances of their family life and will repeat the pattern of alcohol abuse themselves. Scientific and statistical evidence indicates the children of alcoholics are four times more likely to abuse alcohol as teenagers or adults. They are also more likely to marry into families where alcohol is a problem.
Parents who abuse alcohol should think long and hard about how their behavior is affecting their children. These children should receive professional help to prevent serious problems in adolescence and adulthood, include alcoholism and drug abuse. With therapy, they can learn to accept that they are not responsible for the behavior of their parents and that they can break the chain of inherited alcoholism. Contact Sunrise Recovery to have your questions about alcoholism and treatment of alcoholism answered.
